Sometimes dreams are so real they affect your emotions when you wake up, and nothing makes you quite so mad as dreaming of your spouse cheating on you. Even when you realize it was just a dream, it’s hard to shake those feelings.
And if you’ve had a dream about your wife or hubby cheating on you, you’re not alone. These dreams are super common – and they don’t usually indicate your spouse is involved in any sketchy relationships. Dream experts explain what this dream means (and what it doesn’t):
You’re breaking a promise to yourself
Years ago, almost every week I dreamed my boyfriend at the time cheated on me. He was a good guy and I totally trusted he wouldn’t cheat on me. Being cheated on wasn’t even a deep seeded fear I had, but still these dreams were so common I started to wonder if something was off.
It turns out it was … but not about him.
I had a lot of inner uneasiness at the time. There were several things I needed to change about my life. On her blog, dream analyst Jane Teresa said this could be the cause of those cheating dreams.
“Dreams about cheating are about what’s going on within you,” Teresa said. “Cheating is a betrayal of trust, a promise broken. Cheating is lying. When you have these dreams, ask yourself where you might be cheating yourself.”
You’re not getting enough time with your spouse
Sometimes cheating dreams come because you feel neglected, dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg told Today Health. If your spouse is spending more time than you think he or she should at work, with friends or working on a hobby, that feeling of being cheated on time with your spouse could be leaking into your sleep life.
You may be in a belief transition
Everyone goes through belief transitions in their life. When you’re starting to see the world in a new way and trading in some of your previous thoughts for new ideas, Teresa said this could make you feel guilty. You might not consciously recognize it, but your subconscious is working through those feelings – hence the cheating dreams.
You don’t trust yourself
Do you trust yourself to do the right thing? If you’re the one being unfaithful in your dreams, it could be because you are feeling insecure about making the right choices, according to therapist Delphi Ellis.
You’ve recently experienced a loss (or someone close to you did)
When you experience or witness a death, divorce or any other type of separation, you can become hyper-worried about losing your spouse. Even if you don’t worry about infidelity in real life, dreaming about it can be one way of worrying about losing your sweetheart.
You’re deeply worried about being cheated on
It’s an obvious one, but if you have deeply fear infidelity, it will probably pop up in your dreams sometimes – even if you trust your partner.
What to do
These types of dreams aren’t trying to warn you of an upcoming infidelity. Instead, it’s a good time to look around and see what could be causing them and have the conversations with yourself or your spouse to make things right.